Stop Giving Yourself a No

As I step back into this querying process (not my first time here, y’all), I’m struck by how much of it mirrors my day job. When you reach the point of trying to find representation to ultimately sell your product (hopefully), you are entering into the world of career development. You are asking someone to hire you. And after 25 years of working with everyone from college students to senior executives on their careers, here is one of my best pieces of advice, no matter what you're working toward: Stop giving yourself a no.

What do I mean by that? We all do it, all the time. It’s when we don’t apply for a job because we “may not be qualified.” It’s when we don’t ask someone for a conversation because they “seem really busy.” It’s when we don’t query that agent because “they might say no.” You know what? You may not be qualified. They may be busy. They might say no. All true. But if you don’t apply, you don’t reach out, you don’t try, then I can tell you with absolute certainty that the answer, one hundred percent of the time, will be no. And it's not your job to do their work for them.

This doesn’t mean that you should just go for things with zero preparation or honest assessment of where you are. Before you reach out, here are a few simple steps to keep in mind.

• Have you done your homework? For jobs, have you read the job description, studied the organization’s website, done a simple online search for any news articles, looked at sites like Glassdoor? For individual conversations, have you researched them on LinkedIn and other social platforms? If you’re getting ready to query, have you studied Manuscript Wish List, Publisher’s Marketplace, the agent’s website and social platforms? This is all passive work you can do on your own, that should inform your application or your query. It doesn’t take much to show that you’ve done your homework. Conversely, it doesn’t take much to show that you haven’t.

• Are your documents as good as they can be? Get. Feedback. Show that resume and cover letter to friends, to colleagues, to a career coach. Run it through online platforms (one good thing that AI has given us) to make sure you are hitting the right keywords to get past applicant tracking systems. If you are querying, show that letter and those opening pages to as many people as you can. Look at places like the Manuscript Academy or Writer’s Digest where you can sign up (for a fee) for feedback from an agent. Get clear on the requirements. Every job and every agent has different expectations and you need to follow them to the letter.

• Do you know (and can you articulate) why you’re making the ask? Finally, you need to be super clear on why you are applying for this job, or why you are querying this agent. For jobs, connect your resume and cover letter to the job description and make sure you are hitting those key words. The point of the cover letter (and your resume) is to sell them on why they want to bring you in for an interview. That’s it. In querying, include a line that shows you know what the agent is looking for (you’ve done your homework) and you can connect your work to their interests. You’re trying to sell them on asking for more pages. That’s it.

This makes it sound easy, and trust me, I know it’s not. I’m in it, and this is as much a reminder to me as anyone else. I’m working on that list of agents (doing my homework), I’m getting feedback from Manuscript Academy (getting my docs in order), and making sure I can articulate, for each person, the why behind the ask. It's a lot of work. And it's not easy, especially when it comes to that feedback piece. But ultimately I have to make the ask. After all, what’s the point in writing a 300-page novel if you’re not going to share it with anyone? What's the point of dreaming about a new job, if you're not going to take active steps to make it a reality?

So anytime I think, querying is hard, rejection is hard, putting yourself out there is hard, I remind myself: Stop giving yourself a no. It’s the only way to possibly ever get a yes.

No matter what you’re working towards, you’ve got this. I’m rooting for you!